Murray Vs The World

Who’s going to make their first move? One already tried and now theirs two more left. I’m not going to make a choice because I’m not going out my way cause I would feel dumb if it doesn’t last. But only I can get what I’m talking about, and if you know me then you would know what I’m talking about. Some already claims and the other is still observing. And that person wouldn’t be looking for no reason so I hope its what I’m thinking because that would be a waste of time if something wasn’t going to happen.

But … Yeah that’s all I had to say, just wanted to get something off my chest.

I’m feeling them both also =/ This is going to be kind of hard.

In my past I was stuck doing nothing with my life! So my days were always cloudy with no chance of sun shine. But lately I’ve gotten a chance to make something happen, starting from something small to work on something huge. I’m not starting to see the sun glares thru the clouds. The shine isn’t full as yet because I haven’t done everything thats needed to be done so that process is still pending. I always thought I needed certain things to move on in life but once it’s gone… I realize that i’m still living and it’s time to snap to reality. And I feel that snapping back is what’s making me see these glares in the sky.

I cam far from not having much to getting the things I’ve been asking for. I was so use to asking my parents and hearing a no, about what I wanted as a kid. But as for now I’m to a point where I have to supply for myself not asking or needed their help. They want me to learn how it is to supply for myself and experience me appreciating the things I buy and to not be wasteful.

I just had a serious conversation with Blizz about music and the future plans for our music. So he explain almost everything he’s doing, such as meeting top heads in studios and learning everything about a studio. He interns in one of the biggest studios in New York City and he’s mad cool with the people there, so having that in mind he’s going to put in a word for the Street Fleet. Then were going to put in words for other artist we know. So seeing how were getting our foot into the professional business, this would be the perfect time to learn and take things serious and also come with our A Game.

And starting from now I’m going to always be on the top of my game cause I was told by Blizz that I would be the easiest to put out and to have a fan base. So from now till then I’m going to take my time and learn some new things and try new things when it comes to m music. From hearing all those plans man, I can see this year being great!!! I’m also going to meet up with a professional photographer this week to take some pictures for the hell of it. And If I’m loving the way they come out I would take a photo for a tape or something and see how that goes.

When has showing emotion ever became a problem? Like don’t some people want another person that they may like show them? I know some people don’t wanna be left clueless… .Well I know i do because that’s just awesome. But I know some girls that liked me and i liked them back but its like when I show emotion to them its like they don’t accept it then it becomes a problem. 

But seeing how that’s the case, i wont do it then, sucks for the next girl I talk to cause im going to think its a problem to do so lol. Also suck because now thanks to my ex im going to have trust issues cause anyone can say anything to make u feel perfect but then they lie and fuck everything up. But I’m not going to be a jerk to anyone but if I see that your going to lie to me, im going to be a jerk then. And yesss i can be lol don’t test me

When I be freestlying for the hell of it, it’s like now I can never think fast enough on what to say… . And seeing how that is happening, I wonder how it would be if I try to record a song. I don’t think it would be off or different because I know what I’m saying and how I’m saying it. And I also feel like since I been working I’m lacking creativity towards music and focusing more on Photography. But if that does happen I’m not going to let the photography overcome music because Music is always going to be here.

Well I’m going to write something random and see how it goes to a beat, and maybe even record and hear how it sounds. Like lately I just been chilling off of music and took that time to learn some new things about it. I’ve been listening to Kid Cudi’s mixtape (A Kid name Cudi) and I’ve also been listening to J Cole. And I listen to them for two different reasons, well it equal up to the same reason tho and that’s “Style” First off I listen to Cudi to learn how to do a proper and addictive hook. And I listen to J Cole for flows and lines. Not saying that I’m going to jack his lines but to see how he come up with them. So I don’t mean to have this title because I feel I’m only getting rusty when it comes to freestlying so disregard that.

I recently wished down on someone and this was what I said. “I hope your relationship crashes and it doesn’t work out.” and I feel from me saying that, nothing is going to work out for me the time I want to. And I know from my own personal reasons which I’m not going to explain. But yeah man never wish down on anything even if it comes to yourself.

I know people that say “Ohhh well no one cares for me, or Ohh well I’m not going to get that anyway so why care?” Things like that are some of the examples. And I’m not going to lie, I know the main person that was doing that … . . ME. But I learn and it’s simple to learn from that, cause if you keep thinking things wont come your way then straight up … .Your not going to get it. And that’s when wishing down on something kicks into place, because your basically telling them something your going thru, but you just don’t want to admit it. And trust me I know! I just had the balls to say it.

So what I’m trying to say to my friends is … . Always stay positive because it’s going to come back to you. And being negative … Nothing is going to be coming your way. So what would u take?

Not to sound like a slut but I talk to a lot of girls but I can’t see myself being in relationships with some of them and it’s like the ones I do like already have a boyfriend so I’m stuck. Me and my friends were talking about it today, like us having a girlfriend. 

I’m not going to lie, I want a girlfriend to spend time with, seeing how I have a job now and with that in the picture we can go out places and have fun. But this process is going to take a while because I’m waiting for the girl to come around. And for me those are the best but the waiting process is pending for a while because it’s been like 4 months already (Believe it or not) Their’s some girls that I like but I don’t wanna make it seem like I’m rushing things u know? So I’m just going to be in chill mode and see how things lift off. And hopefully something comes up, hopefully my luck kicks in… .

For the slow ones that don’t know I have a job and the music the fleet is coming up with is going to give us a buzz because were getting better and better with the new songs were coming up with. And I can also pay all my friends back from the times I didn’t have a job, I’m known for always having my friends back, even if they have a job no worries.

I’m single so I can take some sexy girls that I know and maybe find someone Along the way so hoepfully that works out but I’m not rushing it. And I can also get all the things I been asking asking for like….

Beats by Dre, iPod touch, cell phone and a playstation 3 And some new gear. So for this time I has this job Im going to be set. And this last thing might sound type niggerish but ….. I wanna go to the strip club and see some booty butt cheeks lol I been dying to do that for a min so what are we waiting for???

My friend Bryan has the beats by Dre headphones and these things are awesome because you can’t hear nothinnnnn and it’s awesome cause you hear nothing but bass lol. And that is what I love to hear, so i wanna see how I’m going to get these headphones. The ones that he had aren’t the ones I want, and I’m not sure of the name but their not the ear bugs but the smaller ones of the studio ones. So the most it should be is around 180 prolly I’m not sure yet but I’m going to check after I post this blog!!! And whoever like to hear your music loud and clear. Get these headphones because it’s worth it. Hands down

I’m going to be soon be hearing some answers from something that happen in the past, and from that time period I haven’t been complete on some concerns. So finally getting the chance to hear what I’ve missed is going to be kinda scary because I don’t know what to expect. But I’m not going to be hurt from it because the damage is already due, but this is only the part one of the 2 … . I feel that I’m not going to know part 2 for a very long time but that’s not really a rush.

I been left in the dark for about 5 years and I’m going to hear everything in just a couple of days … . How should I be feeling now? Well deep down I feel that I shouldn’t be feeling anyway because I gotten stronger from all that had happen to me so this is going to be nothing.

And like i said before about the part two of this, part two is from a whole different person and I just need to know why! And for some reason that is the hardest question for a person to answer. A three letter word can mean something soo huge… same thing with four letter words “Love, Hate, Dead, Etc…” I don’t like for things to end with no purpose behind it because theirs always a reason. If were going to end … . end it on a good note! Girl’s need to stop playing me and grow the fuck up!! I don’t care if you take that to the heart. Recognize who really care for you.

I think of many different counter actions when it comes to one simple things! My mind thinks of the most craziest details… . . Even things that I would hate to see and think about it. For some odd reason I can’t control what I think of, like my mind has a mind of its own. And I know that might sound stupid but that’s how it really feels. I’m happy i have a way to speak mind mind, like doing something creative… . and that thing I speak of is music! I just also wish I can draw because I always have pictures of random people in my head.

Dreams? The dreams that I sometimes have happens for real but then I wont remember the dream till I see it in reality. And that would happen years from now, its like things would become a blurr in the dream but when I see it in front of me in reality it’s crystal clear. I did have a dream that things would work out for me this year but I wouldn’t have thought it would happen this fast. And for that happening I’m taking my duties as an adult. So from now on I’m going to do what I need to do!!

~Honor~

So you say you miss me? And that I been on your mind lately and that I never left.. . 

So you say that you still love me? But you mess up and move on to someone else, giving the same love that you had for me to another person…

So you say that, you thought I moved on … when it’s clear to see I haven’t…

So you say things are going to work out in the future but who the fuck told you, that you can read the future?

So you say that I should do this … and do that? So i say no!

And so you say, that I’m hard headed and that I wouldn’t get what I need in life. . 

So then I say … Fuck up and look at me now cause I’m doing what I want to with my life while your stuck tied.

So then they say … Yo your a player how do you do what you do?

So then I say … . It’s not what I try to do … It just happens.

So then you say you love me … . I can’t return the mutual feeling.

So then you say all these swears about me but yet say it to my face.

So … . . You seen what they, he, she said … But what would you say?

I know a lot of people been trying to get in contact with me and wonder why I’m not hitting them up. So in this blog im going to talk about what I been up to ok? Good!!

Well if you didn’t notice I’m working now … . U know now, and when I come home from work I’ll most likely be in the house online chilling or chilling with my homies. And once I get home I go str8 to sleep or just don’t go online. I been asking for a lot of days to work so I can get a cell phone so y’all can contact me more easier. I also been talking to a lot of new people and a lot of old faces and that’s pretty cool cause I’m seeing people I haven’t seen in like 4 years.  Thank Facebook lol 

I also been traveling NY like crazy lol so yeah man I haven’t been lazy but at the same time I been lazy!! lol

This is a test I’m using a iPod touch